We are gathered here today to discuss that noblest of foods, the very heart of which is a chemical compound so divine it is called "theobromide," or "food of the gods":
And not just any chocolate, either, folks; no, today, we are gathered to discuss the only kind of chocolate worth discussing and that would be
Dark chocolate even has articles written about its health benefits. But here's the thing, folks: dark chocolate means you get more sex. It means you're more intelligent. It means you're funnier and more attractive.
In short, dark chocolate is the perfect food.
Dark chocolate in coffee is even better.
And dark chocolate drizzled on my lover's stomach to be licked off...