10 April 2008

The Fallow Time

First of all, let me apologize to my fellow authors for not being as active on the blog as I should, but then again, that is the very reason I am writing this particular post.

I have turned off my chat-loops, cut out most of my e-mail, and have done the barest minimum I could get by with for several weeks now. I have been a virtual hermit (get it), taking a very much needed break from anything that even remotely resembles writing or promotion. I have hit the fallow time, that point in any endeavor when progress is slowed to a halt, the creative fields are iced under, and the seeds to be planted in the future wait dry and lifeless until the proper time.

As with all things, even our lives have differing seasons. The trick is to know what they are, and how to honor the gift each season brings--a difficult thing to do in this modern world of go, go, go, go, go. But to fight the seasons is to fight nature herself, a thing that even our most advanced technologies have yet to master. Nature will win in the end. She always has, she always will.

I haven't written a word for nearly two months. After the first week, I quite bashing myself over the head, let go of my guilt, and looked around for something to fill the time. Then I saw my poor neglected house. Sad, doesn't begin to describe the state of my humble abode. The floor tiles were cracked, the curtains and bookcases covered with dust, the laundry baskets filled to overflowing--and I hate to admit it, but when I reached the bottom of them, I found clothes I hadn't seen in over a year. Gah!

I hauled out my entire wardrobe, sifted through the piles, and sent half of it to the yard sale to benefit the local animal shelter. I can't tell you how many items I found with the tags still on that I had never even worn...you know, the things you buy on sale, well, because they were on sale. I ordered new carpet and had it installed...which required me having to pack up everything in the living room, again, quite a few items made it into giveaway boxes. I painted my front door a hot shade of Feng Shui red and added brand new gold curtains!

I cleaned out the pantry (you do not want to know how old some of the cans of food were), and bought a new comforter for the bed. I have read wildly and madly, book after book after book, replacing the well of imagination that I have recently let shamefully run dry.

And I have come to the conclusion that I am OK. I am well, and whole, and nearly ready to start anew. My house hums with its new-found elegance, my sons smile and invite all their friends over to see, and I feel as if I have cleaned out a part of myself along with the bulging closets.

Fallow times happen as the wheel turns round its axis. But there is beauty waiting, if one can slow down enough to find it.

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